Sunday

         Sundays are my favorite days of the week. A time to relax, to ponder, read the scriptures and be with family. Oh how I miss that last one. Sundays here at college, on the other hand, never really feel like sunday. Maybe it is because I am on my own, with other people that are not my family, and my church meetings are held in a classroom in my history building. Doesn't have the same feeling. That is why I miss home so much. It actually felt like sunday when I was there. I know, I know, stop thinking about home! You can't be homesick anymore! But that is the problem with Sundays. They give me too much time to think and wonder about home, and too much time to think of what I would be doing if I were at home. I miss it way too much. More than I should, I feel. I start my second week of school tomorrow, and I am just hoping that this week and the weeks to follow will go by really quickly so I can come home. I have been thinking this morning about next semester, and if I should come back to BYU-I or stay home and go to community college. I keep wanting, so desperately in my heart, for the Lord to give me a reason to stay home when the option of next semester comes. Just so I don't have to decide by myself. Because we all know how much I love making decisions and how good I am at it...or not. But then, I think to myself, should I just stick it out another semester after this one ends, just to see if I really do belong here? Because what if an amazing opportunity comes while I am here in the spring and I might have missed out on it if I stayed home? Holman's are not quitters. My mom and dad always tell me that. maybe that is why I am being so hard on myself. If i don't come back, will I feel like I quit? But my sister didn't go even though she was all signed up and ready! And my cousin quit after one semester! So what about me? What am I supposed to do? Once again, I am over thinking things. But I feel it is better to put my thoughts in writing rather than bottling them up and stressing myself out about them. See, too much time to think on Sundays. Way too much time to think. Maybe I need to readjust my thinking direction. Instead of thinking if I will come back or not, maybe I should think about what I want to teach when I finally graduate. If I ever do... Well, I have a meeting at 11:50, so I should probably eat some food and go. Until next time, Thoughtful.